Dreaming in Orange Velour.

19 May

So I keep having this horrifying reoccurring dream.  In this dream, I go to get ready in the morning and my closet is bare…except for one shirt. An appalling, orange, velour turtleneck with a zipper on the neck. Barf. The worst part of this dream? I did not create this piece of clothing from some dark and disturbed corner of my subconscious.  This was my go-to piece circa ’99. No jokes here folks.  I will find a picture and include it for your comedic benefit.  Anyway, this dream got me a-ponderin’.

For every piece of evidence supporting the theory that fashion and style are cyclical, there is a woman out there with a closet chock full of dickies and slouching shoulder pads.  For every girl cutting off her mom’s old high-waisted Levi’s, there is a girl convincing her mother that neon track jackets and earrings the size of your face have in fact not made a comeback.  My own mother saved the outfits she and my father were wearing when they met each other in the late 70s. And let me tell you..both would be borderline acceptable outfits today.  Classic blouse/flannel /jean/skinny belt combos.  The width of the bell bottom may be out, but you can hardly go anywhere today without seeing flannel-clad men.

So the question arises; how do you determine which closet items are forever pieces, and which will be the orange velour turtlenecks of your nightmares?  

Things to think about:

 Stick to well-fitting items, and keep the classics. This may seem like a no-brainer, but we can all admit to purchasing and even loving certain trends that are painful to look back on…(gauchos anyone?).  We may have been in style, but they are painful simply because the clothing is not particularly flattering to our figures.  Everyone’s body is different so there is no possible way that EVERY trend will look amazing on EVERY body.  Stick to the one’s that flatter your assets and hide your flaws…that is, if you have any ;)  Also, be sure to keep the classics.  Think about what NEVER goes out of fashion. A great classically cut LBD, a well-fitting/no frills white blouse, a non-tapered, boot cut denim…simple and well-structured are the key for these pieces.  Remember! Just because you spent too much money on a piece of clothing, or because it was your favorite thing for a year doesn’t mean it will stand the test of time. 

Stick to these tips and your closet will continue to evolve beautifully over the years.  The occasional orange velour hiccup will inevitably happen, just be sure you have the strength and courage to let it go. Both your future daughter and your present-day pride will thank you.


Bathroom Compliments.

13 May

Ah the elusive bathroom compliment. Come on ladies. Let’s just put it out there shall we? We dress for each other. Do we want guys to care? Yes. Do they? No.   As long as whatever you put on your bod shows off your bum, gams, ta-ta’s or better yet, all three, you’ve got that demographic covered.  Who we really dress for is the girl in the stall next to us.

Hidden in the endless parade of 20-somethings emerging from the ladies room is the only free fashion show you’ll ever attend.  While contemplating how long it would take to just squat in the alley, your eyes will inevitably move to those around you. You want her shoes. You want her dress. She has great hair…That girl’s got it all wrong. Eventually you look down wondering how your peer critics would report on your outfit- a hit or a miss?

Each time we prepare for a night of club-bangers and ensuing headaches, the person we really consider is the girl in the next stall.  You know, the one you stood behind while trying not to drool over her impossibly effortless style. Next thing you know, there you are…both at the mirror.

Sometimes it’s simple: she glances your way and mutters “great outfit” before fixing her bra and leaving.  Sometimes it’s not.  “Ohmygosh. I saw that dress yesterday and I was soooo gonna buy it but I didn’t and now im just dying. ugh. dy-ying. You look ah-mazing. Ah!” (drunken sway aaaand exit).

However annoyingly it may be expressed, you may claim sweet victory. You can leave that crowded club bathroom satisfied in more than one way.  For you have achieved the coveted bathroom compliment. No shame my dear, we are all human–we desire envy.  We desire flattery. So be free of your self-deprecating ways..be free from your self-inflicted dungeon of wardrobe mediocrity.  Be better. Be desired. Be complimented.

An easy choice for going out is always the little black dress.  But don’t you dare stop there.  Pair with some sassy heels and bold makeup.

Party Rock!

David Lerner longer length dress
$247 – pinkmascara.com

Free People cap sleeve dress
$168 – freepeople.com

Camilla Norrback strappy pumps
€100 – nelly.com

NYX lipstick

Lancôme lip gloss
$27 – lancome-usa.com

Bobbi Brown Cosmetics beauty product
£32 – selfridges.com


Hello there.

13 May

Clothing should be a way to express emotion, passion even opinion. For at least part of our lives most of us figure this out.  Just picture every angsty teen dressed in shredded or too-tight clothing that their parents just “don’t understand” .  At what age do we lose that? When do we stop trying to make a statement with what we wear? Perhaps it’s in college when greek letters plastered across tiny t-shirts and padded bras are the norm. Or that first job where style flies out the window, dress codes reign, and your grandma suddenly thinks your outfits look “sharp”.  Regain your wardrobe identity people!  At least outside of your office. I have to wear scrubs…you have to wear a nauseating sweater set that covers your clavicle.  I may not be able to convince your HR rep clad in a polyester blend suit she found on sale that there is a tasteful way to show work-appropriate decolletage.  But I can convince you to take charge of your post-work and weekend style. And who knows…if we’re lucky we’ll throw in some makeup, hair, and accessory tips that will camouflage your own collection of clearanced poly-blends.

This is me! I am 23, recently graduated and happier than ever. Not sure what my next step is so bear with me while I figure it out. Thanks for reading!